So- But- Of Course by Rae Monroe

Lonely midnight oven fries,

Crowded condo and dark beach

Pits hidden in the sand; I fell

(A shark nibbled the silver ring

On my right pinky toe)

And I could say I was trapped and hurting

And I could argue that I was alone

And I could say the monster who laid me down beside you

Was to blame,

but wasn’t it also

Me yanking a puppy, snapping at it

Me pushing loves away, turning off emotions

Me shoving myself into my mother’s womb,

Claiming to belong, so—but—of course

It’s like I was begging, screaming for it, so—but—of course

I need you to put your hand right here,

In the deepest part of me

And tell me not to be scared

So—but—of course

Rae Monroe (she/her) was born in Mississippi but grew up around the world. Her work has been published in multiple journals.